you always carry picks in your wallet, but not necessarily cash.
you start a scale in the wrong place, and your wife comes home and tells you she bought a new g-string and you answer, “Cool, Phosphor Bronze or Nickel wound?” ( mojoman )
your wife tells you she dented the fender, and you run to the guitar room to check on your strat. ( mojoman )
no matter where you are in your house, you’re within 5 inches of a tray of picks.
you go through more strings than girlfriends.
you tie your shoes up with high gauge strings.
you’ve ever been sprayed with water to make you stop playing.
you’ve ever taken speed just to play death-metal.
you’ve ever threatened someone with physical violence after they bump into the head of your guitar (and caused it to detune).
you’ve ever yelled at someone for playing one of your old guitars, that hasn’t been touched in 2 years.
you’ve ever dropped what you’re doing to go across town on “emergency pick run.”
you can play Stairway to Heaven on any stringed insturment.
you take more than one guitar on a 3-day vacation.
you’ve ever missed two meals in a row trying to “tab out” a song.
you’ve ever stopped playing a song in the middle because of a mistake that no one else noticed .
you’ve ever figured out tv commercial jingles/tv show themes just to kill time.
someone has threatened to injure you if you play Stairway to Heaven one more time.
you have one or more guitar within reaching distance while reading this.
you have a strong urge to play your guitar while reading this list.
you are reading this list with a guitar on your knee.
you have taken a break from reading this list to play guitar.
