66+ signs you’ve been in the [marching] band too long

Started by: Lori Dyer

  1. When you hear music and you start marking time.
  2. When you walk behind someone and you’re in step with them.
  3. When you try to guess the tempo of your favorite song.
  4. When all your friends are in the band.
  5. When you don’t mind changing clothes on the bus.
  6. When you point out key changes and dynamics while listening to the radio.
  7. When every guy/girl you’re interested in is in the band.
  8. When you like wearing your uniform.
  9. When people ask you about your social life and you say, “Oh, you mean my flute/trumpet/drum/etc.?”
  10. When you consider your drill book a fashion accessory.
  11. When someone hits a wrong note and you chew them out for an hour.
  12. When you practice your instrument more than you talk to your dog.
  13. When being mauled by a drum is a normal part of life.
  14. When people worry when they see you without you instrument.
  15. When “armed guard,” means a girl with a pole instead of a guy with a gun.
  16. When band camp is FUN.
  17. When you answer to “Band Nerd.”
  18. When someone says the words “atten hut” and you automatically put your head up.
  19. When you remember flats and sharps more easily than your name.
  20. When you dress the lunch line, and urge others to do the same.
  21. When your mouth is frozen to your mouth piece, and it feels normal.
  22. When left slides or right back slides feel normal.
  23. When your instrument has a name.
  24. When you remember your instrument’s birthday and forget your mom’s.
  25. When making a line is you biggest accomplishment of the day.
  26. When back marching no longer reminds you of ballet.
  27. When you give your instrument a birthday party.
  28. When you can make white shoes look black.
  29. When your uniform fits.
  30. When black feathers become a fashion “do”.
  31. When you see your section more than you see your family.
  32. When everyone wants to kill the other football team…and you want to kill the other band.
  33. When you have dreams about early morning marching band.
  34. When you think morning practices should start a half-hour earlier.
  35. When you accidentally call your band director “Dad”.
  36. When you CAN sight-read.
  37. When you can put on you uniform in less than 10 minutes.
  38. When reeds taste good.
  39. When you have a band song stuck in your head, and you tap your foot to the beat.
  40. When you think your plume is alive.
  41. When marking time is your favorite form of exercise.
  42. When you have a neck strap/harness tan line.
  43. When you subconsciously start practicing with a pencil.
  44. When numbers past 8 aren’t important.
  45. When you’re more opinionated about the Madison vs. American Fork Bands than the Monica Lewinsky scandal.
  46. When you roll-step through the cafeteria so you don’t spill your lunch.
  47. When you’d rather practice than read this list.
  48. When letters past G aren’t important.
  49. When the only class you look forward to is band.
  50. When you actually like marching band and would kill to do it all year long.
  51. When you wonder what life would be like if you weren’t in band.
  52. When you roll step while you walk to class.
  53. When you major in music.
  54. When you use your high school band director as a role model.
  55. When those stupid “band humor” jokes are the funniest things you’ve ever heard.
  56. When you pick the instruments from the music in cartoons.
  57. When you start screaming “LEFT! LEFT! LEFT!” to the people that walk in front of you on the way to class.
  58. When you’ve dated everyone in the band and now wonder if you’re ever going to have another date.
  59. When you think the trumpeters have a right to be egotistical.
  60. When you don’t think the flutist have a slight attitude problem.
  61. When you change your instrument to the tuba.
  62. When you have perfect pitch.
  63. When the band director is always right.
  64. When you marry that special someone in your section.
  65. When you have kids and force them to be in music.
  66. When you get the jokes on this list.
  67. when you aren’t sure which is more dangerous a girl with a flag or a guy with a gun!

You might be a band geek if…

  • during concert season you wish you where out on the field. ( Jennie *Goober* )
  • you can be found before school, at lunch, and after school down in front of the band room with all the other band members. ( Jennie *Goober* )
  • you spend more time in the band room then at your own house. ( Jennie *Goober* )
  • you are way too protective of your cubby hole. ( Jennie *Goober* )
  • you role your feet marching everywhere. ( Jennie *Goober* )
  • you look forward to band camp every summer. ( Jennie *Goober* )
  • you relate with the band nerds is the movie American Pie. ( Jennie *Goober* )
  • the only dresses you have are black and concert style. ( Jennie *Goober* )
  • for guys, the only dress clothes you have are dress slacks and tuxedo shirts ( Jennie *Goober* )
  • you go to parades that you are not in and make sure lines are straight, horn angles are parallel, and everyone is on step. ( Jennie *Goober* )
  • you listen to the classical station and can name off songs that you remember playing in band. ( Jennie *Goober* )
  • you take comfort in the sound a baton makes banging agaisnt a podium. ( Jennie *Goober* )
  • you own your own E-flat clarinet. (Jamie)
  • you visit your band director everyday at his house.
  • …or you babysit his kids for him.
  • you can play every cadence the drum corps plays despite the fact you play clarinet. (Colt_saa_45)
  • From Miranda:
    • you always start off on the left foot.
    • you can’t walk and listen to music at the same time without marching to the beat.
    • your fondest memories of high school are from being in the band.
    • your best achievements have included becoming first chair and section leader of more than one section.
    • when you hear your favorite songs from band you can’t help but do the fingering for the notes with the song.
    • you don’t know the melody of a song because you only remember the part you played in band.
    • you can pick out all the different parts in any song.
    • …and name the instruments that play them.
  • you still wear your band shirt, from your senior year–ten years ago. ( HeidiPR )
  • you count down the days remaining until field band camp. ( matt )
  • you have a favorite cadence. ( melvan )
  • you walk in step with your friends in the hall, in the street, across campus… ( logan )
  • …or scream “LEFT, LEFT” at people out of step with you.
  • you conduct every time you hear a song play on the radio. ( seamz3 )
  • you proudly show off your trumpet mute collection. ( Jenn )
  • you’ve managed to build a beach-side hut using your old reeds. ( jessa )
  • you constantly sing old band tunes three or four years after graduating.
  • you go back to your old high school to help with summer band practices. ( star437 )
  • you try to hurt the other band at a football game. ( star437 )

(More) You might be a band geek if…

…one time, you went to band camp and came back with a girlfriend.

…you actually like wearing your marching uniform.

…you have your band director on speed dial.

…you have your band director as an emergency contact. (…but what if you’re at band camp??)

…you have your high band teacher’s home AND cell numbers on speed dial.

…you name your instrument.

…you cried when you found out you couldn’t be in band.

…you tell your friends its a band thing and they understand.

…you’ve dated everyone in the band and wonder if you’ll ever have another date again.

…you think Louie Louie is the best song ever.

…playing star down with the drum major isn’t fun anymore.

…you direct the songs on the radio.

…you know (from experience) that the band director is always right.