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You might be a Canadian if...

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  • You're not offended by the term "HOMO MILK".
  • You understand the phrase "Could you pass me a serviette, i just dropped my poutine, on the chesterfield."
  • You eat chocolate bars, not candy bars.
  • You drink pop, not soda.
  • You know that a mickey and 24's mean, "Party at the camp, eh!!"
  • You don't care about the fuss with Cuba. It's a cheap place to go for your holidays, with good cigars and no Americans.
  • You know that a pike is a type of fish, not part of a highway.
  • You drive on a highway, not a freeway.
  • You have Canadian Tire money in your kitchen drawers.
  • You know that Casey and Finnegan were not part of a Celtic musical group.
  • You get excited whenever an American television show mentions Canada.
  • You brag to Americans that: Shania Twain, Jim Carrey, Celine Dion, Michael J. Fox, John Candy, William Shatner, Tom Green, Matthew Perry, Mike Myers, Neve Campbell, Pamela Anderson Lee and many more, are Canadians.
  • You know that the CEO of American Airlines is a Canadian.
  • You design your halloween costume to fit over a snowsuit.
  • You know that the last letter of the English alphabet is always pronounced "Zed".
  • Your local newspaper covers national news on 2 pages, but requires 6 pages for hockey.
  • You know that the four seasons mean: almost winter, winter, still winter and road work.
  • You know that when it's 25 degrees outside, it's a warm day.
  • You understand the Labatt Blue commercials.
  • You know how to pronounce and spell "Saskatchewan".
  • You perk up when you hear the theme song from "Hockey Night in Canada".
  • You are in grade 12, not the 12th grade.
  • "Eh?" is a very important part of your vocabulary, and is more polite then "Huh?".
  • ... And this is a simple joke.. no need to flame how non-superior Americans are.
  • You know all the words to "If I had a million dollars" by The Barenaked Ladies, including the inter-stanza banter between Steven and Ed
  • You dismiss all beers under 6% as "for children and the elderly."
  • You wonder why there isn't a 5 dollar coin, as you can only use more change.
  • You watch MuchMusic constantly, in the hopes of occasional fleeting glimpses of The Tragically Hip.
  • You participate in Participaction!
  • Your backpack has more than one Canadian flag iron-on.
  • You use a red pen on your non-Canadian textbooks and fill in the missing 'u's from labor, honor, and color.
  • You can eat more than one maple sugar candy without feeling nauseous.
  • You think -10 C (14F) is mild weather.
  • You have twins named Donovan and Bailey.
  • You have twins named Wayne and Gretzky
  • You can drink legally while still a teen.
  • You get milk in bags as well as cartons and plastic jugs.
  • You know that Mounties "don't always look like that
  • You know what a toque is.
  • You know Toronto is not a province.
  • You never miss "Coaches Corner."
  • Back bacon and Kraft Dinner are two of your favorites food groups.
  • You actually read, not scanned this list