The evolution of a python programmer

#Newbie programmer
def factorial(x):
if x == 0:
return 1
else:
return x * factorial(x - 1)
print factorial(6)

#First year programmer, studied Pascal
def factorial(x):
result = 1
i = 2
while i <= x:
result = result * i
i = i + 1
return result
print factorial(6)

#First year programmer, studied C
def fact(x): #{
result = i = 1;
while (i <= x): #{
result *= i;
i += 1;
#}
return result;
#}
print(fact(6))

#First year programmer, SICP
@tailcall
def fact(x, acc=1):
if (x > 1): return (fact((x – 1), (acc * x)))
else: return acc
print(fact(6))

#First year programmer, Python
def Factorial(x):
res = 1
for i in xrange(2, x + 1):
res *= i
return res
print Factorial(6)

#Lazy Python programmer
def fact(x):
return x > 1 and x * fact(x – 1) or 1
print fact(6)

#Lazier Python programmer
f = lambda x: x and x * f(x – 1) or 1
print f(6)

#Python expert programmer
fact = lambda x: reduce(int.__mul__, xrange(2, x + 1), 1)
print fact(6)

#Python hacker
import sys
@tailcall
def fact(x, acc=1):
if x: return fact(x.__sub__(1), acc.__mul__(x))
return acc
sys.stdout.write(str(fact(6)) + ‘n’)

#EXPERT PROGRAMMER
from c_math import fact
print fact(6)

#BRITISH EXPERT PROGRAMMER
from c_maths import fact
print fact(6)

#Web designer
def factorial(x):
#————————————————-
#— Code snippet from The Math Vault —
#— Calculate factorial (C) Arthur Smith 1999 —
#————————————————-
result = str(1)
i = 1 #Thanks Adam
while i <= x:
#result = result * i #It’s faster to use *=
#result = str(result * result + i)
#result = int(result *= i) #??????
result = str(int(result) * i)
#result = int(str(result) * i)
i = i + 1
return result
print factorial(6)

#Unix programmer
import os
def fact(x):
os.system(‘factorial ‘ + str(x))
fact(6)

#Windows programmer
NULL = None
def CalculateAndPrintFactorialEx(dwNumber,
hOutputDevice,
lpLparam,
lpWparam,
lpsscSecurity,
*dwReserved):
if lpsscSecurity != NULL:
return NULL #Not implemented
dwResult = dwCounter = 1
while dwCounter <= dwNumber:
dwResult *= dwCounter
dwCounter += 1
hOutputDevice.write(str(dwResult))
hOutputDevice.write(‘n’)
return 1
import sys
CalculateAndPrintFactorialEx(6, sys.stdout, NULL, NULL, NULL, NULL, NULL, NULL, NULL, NULL, NULL, NULL, NULL, NULL, NULL, NULL, NULL, NULL)

#Enterprise programmer
def new(cls, *args, **kwargs):
return cls(*args, **kwargs)

class Number(object):
pass

class IntegralNumber(int, Number):
def toInt(self):
return new (int, self)

class InternalBase(object):
def __init__(self, base):
self.base = base.toInt()

def getBase(self):
return new (IntegralNumber, self.base)

class MathematicsSystem(object):
def __init__(self, ibase):
Abstract

@classmethod
def getInstance(cls, ibase):
try:
cls.__instance
except AttributeError:
cls.__instance = new (cls, ibase)
return cls.__instance

class StandardMathematicsSystem(MathematicsSystem):
def __init__(self, ibase):
if ibase.getBase() != new (IntegralNumber, 2):
raise NotImplementedError
self.base = ibase.getBase()

def calculateFactorial(self, target):
result = new (IntegralNumber, 1)
i = new (IntegralNumber, 2)
while i <= target:
result = result * i
i = i + new (IntegralNumber, 1)
return result

print StandardMathematicsSystem.getInstance(new (InternalBase, new (IntegralNumber, 2))).calculateFactorial(new (IntegralNumber, 6))

You might be a spammer if…

  • You put tracking/randomization numbers in your subject lines: Cash-flow-74002006
  • Your entire message body is composed of images, without any description text.
  • gmail can’t seem to “preview in html” the pdf you attached.
  • Your sender name includes one of the following words: panel, notice, meds, travel, survey
    • Note: I said SENDER, not subject. A legitimate sender would at least give me a real “from” address.
  • Your e-mail utilizes horribly bad English in ALL CAPS.
  • Your e-mail doesn’t use English at all.
  • Your e-mail doesn’t even use the Latin alphabet (Cyrillic, Chinese, etc… instead)
  • You put the $ sign in the wrong place and use a period for a 1000s separator (10.000$)
  • You specify US for the $ amount.
  • You can’t manage to correctly spell the name of the product you’re selling me.
  • You write in HAX0r

Drunk needs a push

GOTTA  LOVE DRUNK PEOPLE
Â
  A man, and his wife are awakened at 3  o’clock in the morning byÂ
 loud pounding on the  door.Â

  The man gets up and goes to the door where a drunken  stranger,
  standing in the pouring rain, is asking for a  push.

  “Not a chance,” says the husband, “it is 3 o’clock in the Â
  morning!Â

  He slams the door and returns to  bed.Â

  “Who was that?” asked his  wife.

  “Just some drunk guy asking for a push,” he  answers.Â

  “Did you help him?” she  asks.Â

   “No, I did not! It’s 3 o’clock in the morning and it is pouring
   out there!”Â
Â
  Well, you have a short memory,” says  his wife. “Can’t you
  remember about three months ago when we  broke down and

   those two guys helped  us? I think you should help him, and Â

   you should be ashamed of yourself!”Â

  The man does as he  is told, gets dressed, and goes out into theÂ
  pounding rain. He  calls out into the dark, “Hello, are you still there?”Â

   Yes” comes back the answer.

  Do you still need a push?” calls out  the husband.Â

  Yes, Please!” comes the reply from the  dark.Â

  Where are you?” asks the husband.Â

   “Over here on the swing!” replies the drunkÂ

You might be a bad driver if…

  • you’ve ever offered someone inordinate sums of money for the damage because if the insurance company hears about one more accident…
  • your friends would rather walk five miles barefoot on asfault in 110 degree heat than accept a ride from you.
  • you go to leave the frat party stone sober and your roomate still insists on hiding your kes and calling a cab.
  • people ask you about “the accident”, and you reply, which one?
  • the instructor finally gave up and let YOU teach traffic school. (Mavis)
  • you see a sign that says, “Lane ends 500 FT,” and you manage to drive in the lane for another 1/2 mile.
  • you have the policeman hold your beer while you get your license. (Kealoha)
  • you’ve ever changed a full set of clothes and/or re-done your makeup while on the freeway.
  • you’ve had your license for two months and you’re already an experienced ditch digger.
  • you find yourself trying to beat that old granny before she makes it to the zebra crossing. ( Stu )
  • ….and you always lose, but not before it’s too late. ( Stu )
  • you slow down when coming to green lights…
  • …and speed up on yellow.
  • you hit a tree and your brother tells you your getting rusty cause you missed the center of the car by a fraction of an inch. (Lee)
  • you take your eyes off the road and both hands off the steering whell to help your passenger put on their seat belt while driving 65 MPH down the freeway. (Lisa)
  • you rear end someone at a stop light and then jump out screaming, “Whip lash!!!” (Lisa)
  • you use your knees for steering more than your hands.
  • the police department knows your plate number by heart.
  • the police carry separate tickets with your information filled out already.
  • you think red lights & stop signs are a suggestion (Amon-Ra)
  • you’ve ever asked anyone what a raised finger means because “I get that all the time.”
  • you replace your airbag more often than your oil.
  • you walk into traffic court and everyone shouts out your name.
  • you get pulled over for drunk driving and you are stone sober. (Ken McKinney)
  • you think you have a flat when you hear thump, thump, thump. It’s actually just you clipping the orange and white barrels. (Ken McKinney)
  • Curb? What curb? (Ken McKinney)
  • you are the only car in the parking lot and you STILL hit a light pole. (Ken McKinney)
  • you stop on an on ramp and wait for “enough room”. (Ken McKinney)
  • you have ever hit the car in front of you while YOU were trying to back up. (Ken McKinney)
  • you tell your passenger what a good driver you are as you turn into a ditch. 
  • you swerve to miss a tree… and it’s your air freshener. (Scott)
  • all anyone can see when you drive is your knuckles. (Visitor submission)
  • your turn sign signal is always blinking in the direction opposite to the one you’re turning.
  • you drive 90 MPH in bumper to bumper traffic and always pass on the right (Colonel)
  • you think the signal switch is something that just gets in your way whenever you reach for your coffee.

(More) You might be a band geek if…

…one time, you went to band camp and came back with a girlfriend.

…you actually like wearing your marching uniform.

…you have your band director on speed dial.

…you have your band director as an emergency contact. (…but what if you’re at band camp??)

…you have your high band teacher’s home AND cell numbers on speed dial.

…you name your instrument.

…you cried when you found out you couldn’t be in band.

…you tell your friends its a band thing and they understand.

…you’ve dated everyone in the band and wonder if you’ll ever have another date again.

…you think Louie Louie is the best song ever.

…playing star down with the drum major isn’t fun anymore.

…you direct the songs on the radio.

…you know (from experience) that the band director is always right.