You might be a Canadian if…
You’re not offended by the term “HOMO MILK”.
You understand the phrase “Could you pass me a serviette, i just dropped my poutine, on the chesterfield.”
You eat chocolate bars, not candy bars.
You drink pop, not soda.
You know that a mickey and 24’s mean, “Party at the camp, eh!!”
You don’t care about the fuss with Cuba. It’s a cheap place to go for your holidays, with good cigars and no Americans.
You know that a pike is a type of fish, not part of a highway.
You drive on a highway, not a freeway.
You have Canadian Tire money in your kitchen drawers.
You know that Casey and Finnegan were not part of a Celtic musical group.
You get excited whenever an American television show mentions Canada.
You brag to Americans that: Shania Twain, Jim Carrey, Celine Dion, Michael J. Fox, John Candy, William Shatner, Tom Green, Matthew Perry, Mike Myers, Neve Campbell, Pamela Anderson Lee and many more, are Canadians.
You know that the CEO of American Airlines is a Canadian.
You design your halloween costume to fit over a snowsuit.
You know that the last letter of the English alphabet is always pronounced “Zed”.
Your local newspaper covers national news on 2 pages, but requires 6 pages for hockey.
You know that the four seasons mean: almost winter, winter, still winter and road work.
You know that when it’s 25 degrees outside, it’s a warm day.
You understand the Labatt Blue commercials.
You know how to pronounce and spell “Saskatchewan”.
You perk up when you hear the theme song from “Hockey Night in Canada”.
You are in grade 12, not the 12th grade.
“Eh?” is a very important part of your vocabulary, and is more polite then “Huh?”.
… And this is a simple joke.. no need to flame how non-superior Americans are.
1.You know all the words to “If I had a million dollars” by The Barenaked Ladies, including the inter-stanza banter between Steven and Ed
2.You dismiss all beers under 6% as “for children and the elderly.”
3.You wonder why there isn’t a 5 dollar coin, as you can only use more change.
4.You watch MuchMusic constantly, in the hopes of occasional fleeting glimpses of The Tragically Hip.
5.You participate in Participaction!
6.Your backpack has more than one Canadian flag iron-on.
7.You use a red pen on your non-Canadian textbooks and fill in the missing ‘u’s from labor, honor, and color.
8.You can eat more than one maple sugar candy without feeling nauseous.
9.You think -10 C (14F) is mild weather.
10.You have twins named Donovan and Bailey.
11.You have twins named Wayne and Gretzky
12.You can drink legally while still a teen.
13.You get milk in bags as well as cartons and plastic jugs.
14.You know that Mounties “don’t always look like that
15.You know what a toque is.
16.You know Toronto is not a province.
17.You never miss “Coaches Corner.”
18.Back bacon and Kraft Dinner are two of your favorites food groups.
19.You actually read, not scanned this list