• going 4-wheeling means your old lady has her own bike.
• your gloves don’t have any fingers.
• you prefer to pee outside.
• your beer preference is BEER.
• you treat your leather better than your woman.
• you wash your bike more than you wash yourself.
• rock-and-roll is the only kind of music.
• you think Jack Daniels is your best friend.
• you ride instead of walk down the aisle.
• you pass out with a beer in your hand without spilling a drop, and finish drinking it when you wake up in the morning.

• More You Might be from New Jersey if... You might be from New Jersey if... -you know what "Quick Check" is -you hang out at said "Quick Check" in the parking lot with your friends doing absoutely nothing and talking about what you are going to do to your car next so you can drag race it better.......
• You might be a runner if... http://www.letsrun.com/forum/flat_read.php?board=1&id=9545&thread=9545 ...your toenails are black. ...your shoes have more miles on them than your car does. ...you need a magnifying glass to see your name in the paper. ...you have chafing in strange places. ...people say, "You run three miles...at once?" ...all your socks are either stained or torn. ...your......
• You might be a nurse if... your friends call you for medical advice. ( lloyd , avatarj@mindspring.com ) discussing dismemberment over a gourmet meal seems perfectly normal to you (Mary) you have the bladder capacity of five people you have your weekends off planned for a year in advance you believe that "ask-a-nurse" is an......
• Random thoughts Yet another e-mail forward: I wish Google Maps had an "Avoid Ghetto" routing option. More often than not, when someone is telling me a story all I can think about is that I can't wait for them to finish so that I can tell my own story that's not only......
• You might be a gamer if... You don't think of a Russian bazooka when someone says "RPG". You use game stats to describe things in a movie. (Well, Han just blew his Fast-Talk roll) You use game stats to describe things in real life. You laugh yourself silly when you hear the word "Gazebo". The......

• Your Best Friend The shamanic traditions dealt with the trickster. The Australian aborigines, as well as really all myths, speak of a "time" or phase before anything had a real form. That scary falling place you sometimes get into before you really sleep. That fear you might really go to hell because of......
• Diamonds Becoming A Girl's Best Friend, In a New Way The diamond industry and long been considered the world's greatest monopoly.  De Beers, owners of "A Diamond is Forever" and other stupid catchphrases has controlled this market for a century.  De Beers' success has come from managing the world's supply of diamonds with utmost diligence. If a competitor comes......
• 5 Ways to Save Money when Planning your Wedding This is a guest post from Master Your Card from www.MasterYourCard.com\blog a very informative blog dealing with all sorts of topics ranging from debt collection to frugality.  Any comments will be in red but I am sure I won't have many since my wonderful wife took care of 98% of......
• My 10 week old kitten bites and hates any kind of affection. How do i get her to stop biting and harassing us? I got my kitten Mocha from my friend down the street. This was her cats second litter (all girls). My kitty was the prettiest of them all, along with the most playful and the one who sleeps the most. Her mother was a calico and her father was a yellow......
• What Kind of Credit Card Debt Repayment Person Are You? I'd like to think that I have a wide variety of friends.  These friends range from successful business owners to civil servants to a friend that was unemployed for the better part of 18 months (health reasons).  So it was interesting when I told a bunch of them about getting......

An oldie from the first days of YouMightBe.com…

• you spend so much money on beanies that you can’t afford beans.
• you kick out your grandmother so the beanies can have their own room.
• someone asks you how many kids you have, and you answer, “1030… but some are doubles.” ( SlipStream )
• whenever McDonalds has Beanies, you run from one McDonalds to another just to get the full set. ( Michele )
• you hold up the line at McDonald’s for twelve minutes and seventeen seconds arguing with the cashier who says they are of a particular beanie baby.
• you knock over 5 old people just trying to reach the beanie aisle.
• you actually consider sleeping with that teenage cashier at McDonalds just so you can get all of the stupid things. (Visitor Submission)
• if you and your coworkers take turns faking sick so that you can be in line to purchase the newest Beanie Babies… (Trippin’ Daisy)
• On Beanie Babies day at the ballpark you take 30 kids, pay for all their tickets, and require them to give their Beanie Babies to you after you go through the gate (actually happened). (Japkin)
• you’ve ever assaulted someone just so you could have first pick of the beanie babies.
• whenever McDonald’s has them, everyone in the house gets a Happy Meal.

• Diary of an AOL User One of my favorites from long ago. July 18 I just tried to connect to America Online. I've heard it's the best online service I can get. They even included a free disk! I'd better hold onto it in case they don't ever send me another. I can't connect. I......
• You might be a nurse if... your friends call you for medical advice. ( lloyd , avatarj@mindspring.com ) discussing dismemberment over a gourmet meal seems perfectly normal to you (Mary) you have the bladder capacity of five people you have your weekends off planned for a year in advance you believe that "ask-a-nurse" is an......
• You might be a cheesehead if... Much like the redneck lists, the good lists make you wonder if the person is putting himself down for being one. You might be a Cheesehead if... 1. If your idea of a 7-course meal is a Brat and a 6-pack... you might be a Cheesehead! 2. If the Packer......
• You might be addicted to Twitter if... There is a bird-chirping noise coming from your computer every minute or so. You refer to people as @nickname outside of Twitter (seek help if you refer to them that way in real life) People have threatened to un-friend you on Facebook because you have the Twitter app turned......
• You might be a computer geek if... This was inspired by a site that apparently no longer exists.  I'm starting this one from scratch. you rejoice at the trend toward DRM-free mp3s on Amazon, iTunes, etc... you're a card-carrying member of the EFF when you have to write with a pen, you find yourself using the Palm......

• Financial Goal Setting for 2009 Although it may seem crazy to be thinking about 2009, these last months preceding the beginning of the new year are the perfect time to start setting your goals for 2009. As the curtain closes on 2008, you are ready to assess the past events of the year and start......
• Coupon Tips and Tricks I think everyone who uses coupons likes to develop their own coupon tips and tricks. You know what I mean, right? These are the little things you do to get the most out of your coupons. There’s no such thing a too much of a good thing when it comes......
• Credit Card Debt – Make a Plan to Get out of It Credit card debt is at the heart of many families’ financial problems. Having to make credit card payments every month can easily strangle a family’s budget. First, you have to send a huge part of your paycheck to your credit card companies in order to make your minimum payments. Then,......
• How Much Money Changes Hands in a Single Stock in Just One Minute One of things that still baffles me about the stock market is the vast sum of money that exchanges hands (electronically of course) at such a blistering pace. In the blink of an eye, a few million dollar orders can be quietly executed in any given stock and no one......
• One-year-old McDonald's Happy Meal lasted well ? We all know North America is a fast food continent. With obesity and related illness on the rise, the fact that we're consuming fast food? isn't one of our best traits. Exercise and a diet of fresh food without all the additives and preservatives would help, but how......

• you instruct the bartender on how to make a drink because, very loudly, you explain “That’s how they make them at MY country club.” Then you wait to receive your .19 cents in change and don’t tip.
• you go into a convenience store and buy a pack of gum with a $100 bill then get mad if the cashier can’t give you the right change.
• you insist that it’s the cashiers job to tell you where the coupon is and have them tear it out for you, then complain to the manager when they don’t comply (and yes this happens almost daily…) ( Sin )
• you try on the lingerie without any undergarments, and ask the sales associate to give you feedback. (Angela Edwards)
• you call employees by their first name just because they wear a name tag. ( TiffanyC )
• you insist that lines don’t pertain to you and proceed to push past everyone else to get to the head of the line, because *you’re* the special one. ( apostrophess )
• you escort people out of line for having 11 items in the “10 items or less” lane.
• you walk into a store at 10 minutes to close not knowing what you want and don’t decide for another 30 minutes.
• you yell out what a GREAT TIPPER you are. ( janicexxwxx )
• you *return* the coffee because it’s too hot. ( Jorge D )
• you order water with extra lemon (as if it was supposed to come with lemon).
• you ask for a discount. No reason specified, just that you should get one. (Dave Tibbs)
• you get annoyed if a hardware store, etc., does not have the most obscure component in stock, despite the fact that they haven’t sold one in over 20 years. (Dave Tibbs)
• if you buy 10 cent candy to break a 20 
• you have to separate transactions for two 2/$1.00 candy bars (but then how would I know how much they are apiece?)
• you think the Pre-pay sign on the gas pump is for everyone but you.
• you ask for a bag, big printed receipt, etc, when you feel you have been overcharged for something because you want to get the most out of the company. (Dave Tibbs)
• You can’t read the signs or coupons correctly, insisting you’re right and all the employees are wrong.
• While standing in front of the huge of TVs, you ask a salesman, “Is this all the TVs you have?” (Melissa R.)
• You dare ask for a discount at a restaraunt because your kids didn’t like thier food after they showed their dislike by throwing said food on the walls and the floor (this realy happened) (Melissa R.)
• you chew out the manager of the local McDonald’s for not cleaning up the place, while meanwhile, your kids proceed to launch ketchup packets at each other.
• you pay anything / everything in small change (especially pennies)

• If Operating Systems were Airlines If Operating Systems were Airlines DOS AIR: All the passengers go out onto the runway, grab hold of the plane, push it until it gets in the air, hop on, and jump off when it hits the ground again. Then they grab the plane again, push it back into the......
• You might be a caffeine addict if... you think sleep is for the weak.  you've just had your 20th cup of coffee within 20 minutes on a Friday afternoon, at 4 o'clock, just so "the milk doesn't go bad over the weekend" (Naz) you believe that the coffee bean is a vegetable. you have a website......
• Puns from the Inbox 1. The roundest knight at King Arthur's round table was Sir Cumference. He acquired his size from too much Pi. 2. I thought I saw an eye doctor on an Alaskan island, but it turned out to be an optical Aleutian . 3. She was only a whisky maker -......
• You might be a gamer if... You don't think of a Russian bazooka when someone says "RPG". You use game stats to describe things in a movie. (Well, Han just blew his Fast-Talk roll) You use game stats to describe things in real life. You laugh yourself silly when you hear the word "Gazebo". The......
• More You Might be from New Jersey if... You might be from New Jersey if... -you know what "Quick Check" is -you hang out at said "Quick Check" in the parking lot with your friends doing absoutely nothing and talking about what you are going to do to your car next so you can drag race it better.......

• Why Should You Buy a Hybrid It is important to be brutally honest when it comes to why you should buy a hybrid. One of the top reasons why it would be in your best interest to buy a hybrid car is because when you buy a hybrid, it makes a really big statement about who......
• What's expensive gas for you? We usually fill up our Town and Country at about 1/4 tank, and our fill-ups were running in the mid-$20s for a while. I had made a mental note that gas would be "expensive" when my fill-up cost over $30. Today I hit $29.98 with almost 15 gallons. Gas was......
• TransUnion Reveals National Credit Card Debt on the Rise TransUnion.com, one of the three major credit bureaus, released the results of an analysis study of the trends in credit card lending specifically for the third quarter of 2008, revealing that credit card debt is on the rise. The report is one part of an ongoing series of quarterly consumer......
• The Unthinkable: Giving Up Coffee Ahmed Rabea I've cut down my coffee drinking.  I used to drink ten cups a day - well, ten mugs, really.  I used to associate my coffee drinking with working.  Anytime that I had a task that I was procrastinating about, I would get a cup of coffee.  It......
• Looking for Happiness In All The Wrong Places Last week I had the opportunity to be in downtown Atlanta during mid-day rush. I stopped along a bustling business district to grab a cup of coffee and kill some time. Watching the business crowd hustling along the streets from my warm coffee shop window seat I noticed nearly every......

• you call your mother to ask how long to boil cabbage to make cole slaw. (Geet)
• you look in a cookbook to find out how to boil water.
• the smoke alarm beeps if you even walk near the stove. (Marc R)
• you turn the bowl of rice casserole upside down and nothing gets spilled. (Allronix)
• it takes a hammer and chisel to remove said casserole from the dish. (Allronix)
• your family buys Pepto and Tums in bulk. (Allronix)
• the microwave display reads “TILT!” (Allronix)
• you open your dishwasher after living in your house for two years and the plastic is still in it.
• when you BBQ the kids won’t come outside, instead they stand inside the screen door watching you. (Brenda)
• …three of them hold water guns and the 4th has the phone with 911 on speed-dial. (Brenda)
• the last time you tried to make toast the kitchen caught on fire. ( homerunking24@hotmail.com )
• your apple pie bubbled over and ate the enamel off the bottom of the oven. ( kecia, kecia28@hotmail.com )
• you make tuna noodle broccoli surprise for your roommate and the surprise is that it glows in the dark! (Kecia)
• your homemade bread loaf can be used as a door stop. (Lisa)
• you can use your overcooked food as a weapon.
• your food melts plastic and silverware. ( phyr@jlink.net )
• the dog goes to the neighbors’ to eat.
• all your baked goods have the names “asphalt” or “Hockey puck.”
• you’ve ever cooked a broccoli casserole and forgot to add the broccoli.
• if you cook the leftover cut-outs of a jack-o-lantern. (Justin)
• there are bones in your toast. (Amon-Ra)
• all you cook seems to be left overs. (Amon-Ra)
• the judges in the Beverly Hills Bake-off vote for Elly May Clampett’s biscuits over yours. ( S. Hammond)
• the leftover crumbs make a great replacement for kitty litter. ( S. Hammond )
• your family automatically heads for the dinner table every time they hear a firetruck siren. ( S. Hammond )
• those annoying pest control companies keep pestering you, wanting to buy and patent your recipe for candy christmas cookies. ( S. Hammond )
• you used three boxes of scouring pads, a bottle of Drano and a crowbar, but that macaroni and cheese still won’t let go of the pan! ( S. Hammond )
• you’ve ever burned through the bottom of a pan while cooking. ( S. Hammond )
• you forget and leave a gallon of your homemade ice cream on the porch overnight during a record busting heatwave and the next afternoon, not only is it still solid, but it tastes better. ( S. Hammond )
• the EPA requires that all your garbage cans be marked with large bright red ‘biohazard’ symbols. ( S. Hammond )
• you refer to flour moth larvae as ‘a little extra free protein.’ ( S. Hammond )
• anyone has ever broken a tooth while eating your homemade yougurt. ( S. Hammond )
• your kids know what exactly peas porridge in a crockpot nine days old tastes like. ( S. Hammond )
• you tell them that the grey fuzzy stuff on top of it ‘is good for them.’ ( S. Hammond )
• if you avoid the hassle of having to ever reseason your cast iron skillet by always leaving the remains of the last thing you cooked in there for ‘flavor.’ (Remember that Star Trek episode, ‘Mudd’s Women’?) ( S. Hammond )
• you hate rice, but you keep finding it floating around in your beef stew.
• there’s no such thing as an unusable leftover. ( S. Hammond )
• you know dinner is ready when the smoke alarm goes off. (Scott Smith)
• you really have messed up a salad.
• the family pets are no where to be found during dinner
• around dinnertime, the family seems really interested in going to that restaurant that always has trouble passing the health inspection.
• you have cooked dishes that are more appetizing after two months in the back of the fridge.

• You might be a caffeine addict if... you think sleep is for the weak.  you've just had your 20th cup of coffee within 20 minutes on a Friday afternoon, at 4 o'clock, just so "the milk doesn't go bad over the weekend" (Naz) you believe that the coffee bean is a vegetable. you have a website......
• IT Light Bulb Jokes Q: How many Windows programmers does it take to change a light bulb? A: Four hundred and seventy-two. One to write WinGetLightBulbHandle, one to write WinQueryStatusLightBulb, one to write WinGetLightSwitchHandle... Q: How many technical support personnel does it take to change a light bulb? A: We have an exact copy......
• You might be a bad driver if... you've ever offered someone inordinate sums of money for the damage because if the insurance company hears about one more accident... your friends would rather walk five miles barefoot on asfault in 110 degree heat than accept a ride from you. you go to leave the frat party stone......
• You might be Irish if... You might be Irish if... --There are a statue of the Blessed Virgin AND a Celtic cross AND a leprechaun in your garden. --At least one brother and more than one male cousin have Patrick as a first or a middle name, or at least one sister and more than......
• Diary of an AOL User One of my favorites from long ago. July 18 I just tried to connect to America Online. I've heard it's the best online service I can get. They even included a free disk! I'd better hold onto it in case they don't ever send me another. I can't connect. I......

• Dinner Table by DonJuan Writer To see the world this poem implies, May I as you to close your eyes? Now, imagine, as you are able, A rather large dinner table. And sitting at it is everyone you know, And everyone you used to know. Yes, it's a very implausibly large table, But this is......
• Apple Pie Spice Muffins - Cook At Home Day Welcome to the first edition of "Cook At Home Day", a new weekly feature here on our blog. Today's recipe is for apple pie spice muffins. I've been making these muffins for many years now, and originally got the recipe when cooking for a milk allergic child. Notice that......
• Sign Humor. And I dont want to hear about how long it is. I can see it myself. Or about how much time i have.? A sign seen on a restroom dryer at O'Hare Field in Chicago: Do not activate with wet hands. At a car dealership: The best way to get back on your feet? Miss a car payment. At A Laundry Shop: How about we refund your money, send you a new one......
• How to Fix a Leaky Pipe Whether you're dealing with a slow drip, or you've got a gusher, a leaky pipe can be a serious problem. If the pipe is dripping on electrical wires, it can be even more dangerous. It is important to fix a leak as soon as you discover it. You can waste......
• Baked Goods Can Be Part of Your Diet Many people trying to lose weight think that they must cut baked goods out of their daily diets. They think that because baked goods like cookies, bread, and cake contain carbohydrates and fats, that there is no way at all to fit them into a healthy meal plan. I'd like......