“Unless your a hemroid get off my ass” — Maybe, people should learn to spell and some grammar before making, buying, or affixing bumper stickers.

• You might be a caffeine addict if... you think sleep is for the weak.  you've just had your 20th cup of coffee within 20 minutes on a Friday afternoon, at 4 o'clock, just so "the milk doesn't go bad over the weekend" (Naz) you believe that the coffee bean is a vegetable. you have a website......
• You might be a bad driver if... you've ever offered someone inordinate sums of money for the damage because if the insurance company hears about one more accident... your friends would rather walk five miles barefoot on asfault in 110 degree heat than accept a ride from you. you go to leave the frat party stone......
• You might be from Wisconsin if... This is an old submission from around 10 years ago or more... you have gotten frostbitten and sunburned all in the same week. you have more miles on your snowblower than your car. you owe more money on your snowmobile than on your car. you refer to the Packers as......
• You might be a nurse if... your friends call you for medical advice. ( lloyd , avatarj@mindspring.com ) discussing dismemberment over a gourmet meal seems perfectly normal to you (Mary) you have the bladder capacity of five people you have your weekends off planned for a year in advance you believe that "ask-a-nurse" is an......
• You might be annoying your Facebook friends if... You standard response to any emergency is to post its occurrence as your status, then deal with the emergency. ...bonus points if you solicit advice for handling the emergency via Facebook. You take every "What kind of .... are you?" quiz possible, including the "What kind of chia pet......
• You might be making your coworkers uncomfortable if... (See also Grumpy Coworker) you ask your black coworkers why their people are always trying to keep the white man down. you openly discuss your menstrual cycle. If someone points out the fact that you're a man, bring them up on sexual harassment charges. you push your desk away from......

• Should You Pay Points on a Mortgage? The mortgage loan process can be difficult to understand because...
• Starting From Scratch I graduated from the University of Maryland in May and...
• Five Questions I Ask Myself Before Making a Purchase When I was learning to drive, my mom decided she...
• What You Need to Know Before Buying a Foreclosed Property As housing prices keep falling, many people are considering getting...
• Critical Mistakes in Keeping Blog Visitors One of the most critical parts of your blog is...
• Buying property in Kefalonia for a Second Home For an excellent holiday home choice, you can opt for...

…you have memorized the first 10000 digits of pi…  BACKWARDS.

• The evolution of a python programmer #Newbie programmer def factorial(x): if x == 0: return 1 else: return x * factorial(x - 1) print factorial(6) #First year programmer, studied Pascal def factorial(x): result = 1 i = 2 while i <= x: result = result * i i = i + 1 return result print......
• You might be a Canadian if... You might be a Canadian if... You're not offended by the term "HOMO MILK". You understand the phrase "Could you pass me a serviette, i just dropped my poutine, on the chesterfield." You eat chocolate bars, not candy bars. You drink pop, not soda. You know that a mickey and......
• You might be a nurse if... your friends call you for medical advice. ( lloyd , avatarj@mindspring.com ) discussing dismemberment over a gourmet meal seems perfectly normal to you (Mary) you have the bladder capacity of five people you have your weekends off planned for a year in advance you believe that "ask-a-nurse" is an......
• You might be a cheesehead if... Much like the redneck lists, the good lists make you wonder if the person is putting himself down for being one. You might be a Cheesehead if... 1. If your idea of a 7-course meal is a Brat and a 6-pack... you might be a Cheesehead! 2. If the Packer......
• You might be Filipino if... you don't see a problem with spaghetti [with sauce], white rice, and fried chicken on the same plate. you take brownies to non-Filipino potluck dinners. you have a cartful of corned beef during a sale. you say kutex instead of nail polish. you are stumped when asked what kind......
• You might be a caffeine addict if... you think sleep is for the weak.  you've just had your 20th cup of coffee within 20 minutes on a Friday afternoon, at 4 o'clock, just so "the milk doesn't go bad over the weekend" (Naz) you believe that the coffee bean is a vegetable. you have a website......

How many drummers does it take to screw in a light bulb?
None, we have machines to do that now.
How many bassists does it take to change a light bulb?
None, the keyboardist can do it with his left hand.
How many lead guitarists does it take to change a light bulb?
One — he holds the bulb and the world revolves around him.
How many lead singers does it take to change a light bulb?
Changes? Huh?

• You might be a runner if... the pain of not running is greater than the pain of running. you actually read a novel about running... and its sequel. Inspired by: http://www.letsrun.com/forum/flat_read.php?board=1&id=9545&thread=9545 ...your toenails are black. ...your shoes have more miles on them than your car does. ...you need a magnifying glass to see your name......
• Lawyer Light Bulb Jokes How many personal injury attorneys does it take to change a light bulb? Three -- one to turn the bulb, one to shake him off the ladder, and the third to sue the ladder company. How many contract lawyers does it take to change a light bulb? WHEREAS, the party......
• You might be a Canadian if... You might be a Canadian if... You're not offended by the term "HOMO MILK". You understand the phrase "Could you pass me a serviette, i just dropped my poutine, on the chesterfield." You eat chocolate bars, not candy bars. You drink pop, not soda. You know that a mickey and......
• Operating Systems for Your Brain If your brain required an operating system like your computer does, what would it be like? Windows for brains: You  think about one of any number of things at anyone time but only for a short amount of time because then your mind goes blank as you encounter a "general ......
• Murphy's Laws for EMS The First Law of EMS: All emergency calls will wait until you begin to eat, without regard to the time. Corollary 1: Fewer accidents would occur if EMS personnel would never eat. Corollary 2: Always order food "to go". The Law of Time: 1. There is absolutely no relationship between......
• Random thoughts Yet another e-mail forward: I wish Google Maps had an "Avoid Ghetto" routing option. More often than not, when someone is telling me a story all I can think about is that I can't wait for them to finish so that I can tell my own story that's not only......

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• Earth Day Should Be Every Day   Happy Earth Day Everyone!!! A day where we are...
• How Many Economists Does It Take To Build A Successful Blog? One, if it's The Weakonomist I've thoroughly enjoyed all the interviews I've been fortunate enough...
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• Caution Urged on US Dollar Reserve Currency Status By World Bank President The US dollar has served in the role of world...
• The Benefits of using CFL Lighting 25 percent of a regular home electrical budget is sadly...