You Might be an Engineer if…

  • you have half-broken objects in your house that you refuse to throw away with the hope that you can someday fix them.
  • you spend time looking at house hold products trying to devise a method for improvement.
  • you actually buy technical books.
  • you think that your way is the best way to do everything and constantly challenge ideas.
  • you solder tools together to form new objects
  • you constantly inform people that the ships in Star Wars should all be silent in space. (Stu)
  • …and pick out other faults in movies regarding machines. (Stu)
  • you tell people that time travel is impossible. (Stu)
  • …minutes later you think of how you would build a time machine. (Stu)
  • you know “natural frequency” has nothing to do with bowel movements. (Stu)
  • you get angry when people won’t let you fix things they’ve broken. (Stu)
  • you tried to build Transformer toys out of lego as a kid. (Stu)
  • …and tried to invent various lego contraptions in the hope of making money. (Stu)
  • you beg everyone you know to call you “Scotty.” (Caitlin H.)
  • you can do vector calculus in your head, but you forgot how to do long division. (Psycho Dragon, christop@umr.edu)
  • you consider a databook “good reading” when you’re on the toilet. (Stu Bell)
  • the first thing you do with anything new is take it apart to see how it works. (Stu Bell)
  • the last time you moved, you needed two dumpsters to haul off the scrap electrical parts from your work room.  (Stu Bell)
  • you not only know what a left-handed constabulator is, but you designed one once, for fun.  (Stu Bell) Okay, okay… I’m more of a computer geek than an engineer…
  • you paid more for math and science books during college than most people pay for tuition.

  • Dead.Juice

    My dad is an engineer.
    I HATED doing yard/construction work with him.
    We’d have to move something across the yard, or put up something like a shed, e.g.
    What follows is 20 minutes of him making notes, taking measurements, moving something barely related to the project around, another 10 minutes of notes, and then we move it to where it needs to go. He reads some notes, does more measurements, and we move it/take it apart and rebuild it, repeat latter part several times.
    Congrats, night has fallen it has taken 4 hours to move two object across the yard, or to put up four corner posts and a floor for a shed. (the posts will likely be taken out the next day because he doesn’t like how it looks. Somehow, moving them all a centimeter in a different direction while make him satisfied)

    But as annoying as working with him always was, everything he made was perfect. He’d build a shed by hand with a few boards and posts from Home Depo, some old nails he had laying around in a toolbox and it’d be strong and reliable, not to mention great looking, for a whole decade.