*  you eat frozen pizza without microwaving it. ( you can cook those things? )
* you use a stapler to adjust the length of your trousers. ( Bert van Viegen, viegen )
* you get your furniture out of the clean up pile and then brag about how it didn’t cost you a thing. (Karen, KarenW )
* you sniff your underwear to see if you can get by just one more day without doing the wash. ( Lisa, demick )
* you actually use the following link: How to Get a date
* your refrigerator is packed full of tupperware dishes filled with molded smelly food because you just don’t want to wash them. ( Lisa, demick )
* you’ve bought the Ziploc disposable plasticware so that you won’t have to wash containers with molded food.
* you open a food container in the frige to see what it is but can’t, and then you smell it and it knocks you unconscious. ( Lisa, demick )
* the only thing that snuggles next to you in bed is your dog and/or cat. (Lisa)
* you actually have money in your savings account. (Lisa)
* you bought clean guest towels 3 years ago and they are still hanging up, unused. (Lisa)

* you haven’t cooked in so long you’ve forgotten where things are in your kitchen and what buttons to use on the stove.
* you own a home, but behave like an apartment dweller ( pazmenot )
* you’ve often wondered how many empty pizza boxes constitutes a collection. ( sdali )
* the only kitchen appliance you know how to use is the microwave. ( Jorge D. )
* you have a disproportionate number of plastic utensils and paper plates vs. real silverware and plates.
* you haven’t eaten a meal at home that wasn’t in a disposable container.
* you don’t know how to take out the trash. (tman399 )

* you have to look to see how clean your apartment is and not how full your calendar is to decide when to go out on a date. (Barbie, ValleGrly )
* you smell your clothes to see if you can wear them (again). (Barbie)
* you can clean engine parts in the bathtub without someone yelling at you.
* you buy a really big trashcan for the kitchen so you don’t have to take it out as often.
* you amuse yourself by lobbing beercans so that they bounce off the wall before hitting aforementioned trash can.
* it takes you ten minutes every six months to buy new clothes (Let’s see, I’m out of jeans, white T-shirts, black T-shirts, and socks..)
* you don’t feel compelled to wear underwear unless you have a date that night.
* you car gets waxed more often than the toilet gets cleaned. (People clean toilets?)
* you belch and fart in public without apologizing. (Bert van Viegen, viegen )
* you turn your socks and underwear inside out so you can wear them twice as long. (Laura Goodwin, LaLaura )
* you have the pizza place on speed dial. (Matt Duxbury, autobahn )
* instead of cleaning for guests, you just keep the lights low. (Matt D.)
* paper towels double as dishes. (Matt D.)
* BEER is the freshest item in the fridge. (Matt D.)
* …beer is the ONLY item in the fridge.
* you never listen to your messages when a female is around (Matt D.)
* your entire house is trashed except for you entertainment center, which you lovingly polish every day (Amy R.).
* If cooking anything longer than five minutes is a waste of time (Marc L., glumarc )
* The last time you cleaned the house was when you moved in (Marc L.)
* A dress shirt is “fine” if it only has one or two wrinkles in it (Marc L.)
* You think you left your tie on the nightstand…or was it the closet? (Marc L.)
* You don’t feel guilty about leaving the lid up (Marc L.)

• You might be a bad cook if... you call your mother to ask how long to boil cabbage to make cole slaw. (Geet) you look in a cookbook to find out how to boil water. the smoke alarm beeps if you even walk near the stove. (Marc R) you turn the bowl of rice casserole upside......
• You might be anal-retentive if... you eat the M&Ms in color order. you fold your dirty clothes before putting them in the hamper. From Miranda: you have to have all boxes in the kitchen facing the same way and in order by size. you have all your canned goods organized by type, flavor, and......
• Two (un)romantic poems The following are entries to a contest by The   Washington Post, in which respondents had to write a two-line romantic  poem...except that the last line had to be as un-romantic as the first line  was romantic. 1. My darling, my lover, my beautiful  wife: Marrying you screwed up my  life.......
• You might be a Fear Factor addict if... You might be a fear factor addict if... You say grace like this: In 3...2...1...GO! You can recite Joe's disclaimer at the beginning (the stunts you're about to see...) You've ever cooked with worms you've actually tried to jump from building to building. You're used to the taste of buffalo's......
• If operating systems ran your car. Posted to: alt.folklore.computers From: David Zykin Date: Thurs, Nov 3 1994 3:02 am MS-DOS:  You get in the car and try to remember where you put your keys. Windows:  You get in the car and drive to the store very slowly, because attached to the back of the car is......

• Frugal Christmas Decor - Making the House Look Festive Without Spending A Fortune We started our Christmas decorating this past weekend by getting all of our Christmas decorations down out of the attic. For the past 5 years I have saved all the Christmas cards that family and friends have sent to us, so I now have a substantial collection. I use these......
• Vintage Sports Memorabilia If you are looking for a hobby or an endeavor that is exciting and profitable and you enjoy sports of any kind, then you may want to consider giving sports memorabilia collecting a chance. Maybe you have always had a serious interest in a sport team or a sporting event.......
• The Website In A Weekend Plan For Getting — And Keeping — Blog Readers Website In A Weekend reader Holly J took the WordPress 101 coupon offer and sent in this suggestion: "Getting - and Keeping - Readers." Sadly, Website In A Weekend doesn't have very many readers. Leaving out spammers and scammers, crawlers, spiders and robots, my guesstimation is something like a dozen......
• Cracking the whip... I've been consumed by an urge to impose order on my life for the past few days. My OCD only pops up maybe every fourth month or so, and then I realize that there are scary things growing in the back of the refrigerator and dubious objects in my pantry......
• Organic, Environmentally Friendly Pizza Franchises Coming Soon. Thanks to my buddy Noah for sending me this little tidbit, originally mentioned over at LAist. Here is some info from Pizza Fusion's website...holy cow! Pizza Fusion addresses the needs of today's health conscious consumer with concern for both the individual and the environment by supporting organic agriculture through......

• You might be a gamer if... You don't think of a Russian bazooka when someone says "RPG". You use game stats to describe things in a movie. (Well, Han just blew his Fast-Talk roll) You use game stats to describe things in real life. You laugh yourself silly when you hear the word "Gazebo". The......
• You might be a history major if... You might be a history major if.... 1. You find yourself correcting your parents on their history (especially since the last history class they had was in high school...apparently, my dad thinks that Frank Lloyd Wright was one of the Wright Bros.). 2. You find yourself correcting YOUR PROFESSORS on......
• Musician Jokes What's the difference between a banjo and an onion? Nobody cries when you cut up a banjo. ------------------------------------------------------------------------ How do you get a guitar player to turn down? Put a chart in front of him. ------------------------------------------------------------------------ What do you throw a drowning guitar player? His amp. ------------------------------------------------------------------------ What's the last......
• you might be a Sorg if.... 1. you have a big family 2. you hate when they say your name wrong like sorge or surge 3. your mother calls you your brothers or sisters names on a daily basis 4. when you go anywhere and no one has to be told what your name is they......
• You might be a nurse if... your friends call you for medical advice. ( lloyd , avatarj@mindspring.com ) discussing dismemberment over a gourmet meal seems perfectly normal to you (Mary) you have the bladder capacity of five people you have your weekends off planned for a year in advance you believe that "ask-a-nurse" is an......

• My Wife Just Cut Off All Her Hair For Locks Of Love. OK, not all of it - but a lot of it. She went in for a haircut and was talking with her stylist (who had just finished another haircut that went to the charity) and decided to go for it as well. So what started as a "few inches off"......
• Ask The Readers: Sunscreen for Hair and Scalp? Back in 2000, my friends and I scrapped up as much money as we could to rent a summer house in Newport, Rhode Island. It was one of the best summers of my life and something I'll never forget. Even back then, we knew that spending those weekends in the......
• Getting Rid of Adware in 4 Easy Steps Removing adware can be a pretty big pain in the butt. By following these four easy steps, you can simplify the process quite a bit and make it manageable.1. First, you'll need to identify which type of adware you have on your computer. The best way to do this is......
• DIY = SMC (Saving My Cash) This past weekend, disaster struck. Sort of. But not really. As my wife and I were preparing for a camping trip, I was washing off my scuba gear in the laundry tub. Everything was going hunky dory until I tried to turn off the hot water tap- nothing happened. The......
• Styling AdSense with CSS [custom name="image" value="http://www.danielemarino.net/wp-content/uploads/2009/05/061009-google.jpg"] In these days, I am taking a look for the very first time at Google AdSense. As a result, you can see in the blog sidebar my first AdSense Button. Unfortunately the AdSense buttons, even if you can treat them as images, are not simple images. They......